You are the picture of my heart

You can't express every feeling that you have every moment that you have them.

~When Harry Met Sally



There are days when I just wake up and although I know I need to wake up to go to work and in my heart, I would rather play PS3 online, there is this part of me that wishes I could have days just to wake up and hug you and to let you know there is nothing else in the world I would rather do. There are this days then, like today, when all I want is to look into your eyes and tell you that you are all that matters. That everything I set out to do today is for you. Writing this down just spells out what my whispers and what my mind thinks. But more importantly, it is the only way I know best how to tell you how happy you make me fell. And more deeply, how much you mean to me.

I know there are times when I laze and choose not to get away with you to escape from being tired and choose to be stuck in front of the TV instead. But my heart always is with you. As often as I choose to stay in front, I always after when I watch you can't but help feeling guilty. So I do control more often and I do ask myself more often how also can I make you smile.

These few weeks have been very busy weeks for me at work and I know it takes a toll on us when I can't call just to check on you. But thinking of you at work is the only rest I do get most of the times and also the only comfort on knowing what I'm working so hard for. Can't wait to clear all these outstanding matters when our child is born. These are the things that wake me up most mornings besides you chasing me out of bed.

I like to take these simple moments from time to time to let you know how much you mean to me and how much I need you. I love you and there say you need to show it and not just say it. This is maybe how best I can let you know how much you mean the world to me. Just a simple post on an ordinary Tuesday. But nothing is ordinary or simple when it's about you to me. I love you and I miss you. Thinking of you always.

Writing about Love

" If the people we love are stolen from us, the way to have them live on is to never stop loving them. Buildings burn. People die. But real love lives forever."

The Crow



Writing about love is about writing about you. I wish all I have is about painting you the most beautiful smiles that is simply the way to live life. To paint the most beautiful smiles for the person you love the most from the heart. Love I have come to discover over the last few years with you is more than just an expression, more than just a declaration and more than just words. I want you to know that I have come to discover that love is the outward display of how my heart feels when it found you. It skips a beat when my heart takes a peek. It flies when it sees you smile and kiss me. And it simply finds a home when it found you at the wedding altar.

I write on most days because I understand that the heart can not sustain itself without love. It may beat, it may carry a same rhythm but it truly becomes alive with a reason and a purpose, when it beats a different tune, a different song. And when it happens because of you most of the time, you know you're in love. I wish there was a more perfect description of how you make me feel more than the heart. But for someone who lives and survives everyday based on his brain, to let loose and to be alive because of the heart is the most perfect equation of being alive. You make me be alive, you make me want to see how my heart beats everyday and you make me want to smile like I have never smiled before.

The simple things that your hands touch, that your feelings have and the way you smile because of me lets me know that my heart is not alone and that I am truly alive. It means one thing when my heart can do certain things I never knew it could do but it means so much more when your heart replies the same. Most people say that having a child is the most wonderful gift in the world. But I have come to discover that you are the most precious gift that a man can ask for. I have come to know through pain and through time that your smile can mean more than the most advanced machines or the most beautiful creations, because you are perfect. And that is all I need and ask for.

I love you baby and on this day, I just want you to know that my heart beats for you and you alone. Always. Missing you from work and thinking of you.

A simple Friday

"Maybe it is our imperfections which make us so perfect for one another."

~ Emma



I just close my eyes and people say that the most important things will pop out. All I see is darkness. But if I take a closer peek, I do hear this song, Lathika's theme and you appear. And suddenly I forget the darkness and I see this smile. It's the small things I do at work like this that takes me away for moments. And I do need moments like this when things get a bit too hectic. When there is too much noise and too many moments around me that simply scream. I close my eyes, let the song wash over me and let you come to me. I do not have much time at work to let you know this nor to tell you how much you mean to me at these simple moments everyday.

But it's true that you mean the world to me. You can zhai zhai just takes my breathe away from it all in these simple escapes. It's just a relief and a reminder of what am I doing all this for. I close my eyes and let you take me away to our place where all that matters is your smile. Everyday and if I forget to tell you, know that you are the most important person in my life and I rise and sleep with you in my mind. It's simple to feel this and harder for me to record this. At times, when I read the biography of Steve and see how hard it is for him too to be open at times, actually most times. To be able to say what you really mean can be complicated.

But there is nothing complicated in being honest and open about how much you mean to me. People call it love. I think its a special word to describe a special moment. I feel that way about you, this warmth about all the things that make you, you. When you told me about how much you did in the kitchen and in the living room and about wrapping presents, I was with you. I like to close my eyes and imagine me by your side enjoying doing these little things together. I know when I get back home, I'm so washed out and tired and I just want to rest. Simply sit for a while in the toilet and just let things wash over me. But in those moments too, I think about you. About you just outside.

As tired as I am, I want you to know that I do think about you and reach out to you and just want you close. When I become too tired to talk and too tired for anything but just to find a way to let it all out, your hand holding me tells me it's all okay and that's just the greatest feeling at the end of a day. We're watching Twilight today and I think it's going to be an enjoyable and fun night to end the busy weeks I have been having. That little bit of break seems a nice invite just to get away with you. I love you and can't wait to spend time with you tonight. I promise to make you smile and to give you the same warmth you make me feel. I love you and miss you baby. Muacksss

Seeing You Smile Makes me Smile

In my opinion the best thing you can you do is find a person who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what have you, the right person will still think the sun shines out of your ass. That’s the kind of person that’s worth sticking with.

~ Juno



Writing this to my wife whom I sorely miss whenever I am not with her. I just wanted to drop you a simple note on how much you mean to me and how much I would like to see you smile when you read this. It's the same busy dreadful boring Monday and it makes it more painful to waste a great Monday weather in November being stuck in the office. More importantly, I want you to know where my heart and my mind lies, with you. I wish that I could escape from this and just spend some time holding you and our son close on a beautiful day.

When I woke up today, it was to joy and to a wife who just informed me that there was a hot cup of Milo waiting for me to start the day! These small joys are the small victories that make life a joy to walk with. These small milestones are the ingredients that we have that makes each step a step of joy that finishes the day right. Sometimes when you tell me to have more patience, these small joys and small steps of the day keeps me calm and keeps me smiling. It cools any burning anger that develops and like the breeze, it just gets carried away.

Today, I just want to paint you more smiles. I hope this would be that one small step for you, that one small joy of many that I can give you today. Zhai Zhai is getting bigger by the day, yes he is growing within you by the day. You are more and more beautifully pregnant and it always makes me grin to see him growing inside you and the way you reach out to him and let him know he's not alone. Each movement indeed brings joy and every small thing can make us worry but I am here for you. Always.

Each passing day brings so many messages along with these small joys, that the biggest bundle of joy is yet to come and it's coming soon. Counting down the days until it arrives in our arms, taking each day one joy at a time. I love you baby and I hope you're smiling right now. I miss you.