sitting here

The clock chimed once, twice and then the little birds burst to life chirping to mark the time at exactly 7.00 pm. Been sitting on the bench in front of Dymocks for a few minutes. The old man playing violin looks up sighs and starts the half finished tune from scratch again. Its still cold and I was tired of sightseeing. In that short wait, I have seen roughly a dozen couples walk by, holding hands and most laughing along the way. Its a Saturday and some dressed up and some simply held onto each other because they could.

Sitting there, Perth reminds me so much of Wellington. Both are quiet and both have practically the same kind of stores and shapes, be it from Dymocks to West Bank to Dicksmith Electronics. Yet the souls of both cities are so different. This entire week has been so different. I have been so different. Its been exactly six days, two hours, twenty four minutes and six seconds at writing this line that I have not seen your face. I know because when I closed the door of your car, I was already looking at my watch to count how long would time demand until we would be allowed to meet again which would be roughly for seven days, eighteen hours, forty eight minutes and six seconds assuming I touchdown and check my luggage out at exactly 1 pm.

Now, I am no mathematician. But all I know is that how much I miss you can not be quantified nor can it be measured in simple arithmetics. If not then my love for you would be simply,

Love you = (all my heart + all my mind + all my time + my everything)*(cannot lose you + always be faithful to you + you are my one and only)

But somehow that equation does not add up because when I love you, nothing else matters, so would it be better to say,

Love you = My everything and more

Not quite as well because my love for you can not be simplified nor can it be quantified. So when I say I love you, it goes beyond simple calculation and I hope I never find the answer because when I love you, there are no limits, no boundaries, no rules and most importantly, because you love me too. I feel my perspectives are changing not only because of time but because of you.



Just got back wrapped to my room in two layers. I don't think its the weather thats making me cold because the temperature is actualy slightly warmer than the day before. I think its the heart thats cold. But I'm actually smiling more today and the day before. Because the timer is coming to an end and unless my calculations are wrong, Monday is just around the corner. And today, you sound so happy that my entire room was lit up and my heart was burning like a bonfire. You're smile on the phone simply has that magic. Was down the whole day but your smile reminded me how lucky I am and that its all going to be over soon. Monday is coming and the sunshine is coming back to my world. So Evil Janet, should I lend you a calculator to count our love for you as well? I know the answer to this one, and its 1314. I never make mistakes in my calculations....

a journey of a thousand miles

There is a wise saying in Chinese that a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. Then, answer me this, how come a journey of a thousand miles still ends up the same? Even, getting away so many thousand miles, our time zones are still the same, I still think of you more than ever. I have travelled from one continent to another and you're still there, nothng has changed.

Walked into the terminal and I was still reeling from only 2-3 hours of rest the night before in the plane. Had a baby constantly crying and the seats were uncomfortable all the way during a turbulent midway flight path through the sea. Other than that, coulnd't sleep much either and was thinking/dreaming of you throughout. Wondering how would I react when I see you on Monday and just can't go to sleep thinking of your smile all the way. Was worried about your headache after a two hour ride on a crazy bus.

Was greeted by the infamous cold chill of morning Perth gust and was really 'biten' hard each time the wind got through the automatic doors of the airport. Wondering if Evil Janet must be suffering the same and even worse there. Was tired but everything else was alright. The hotel didin't have the rooms so had to sneak out to get a glimpse of the next adventure ahead.

Went around the King's Park today which was a healthy ten minutes walk up the hill from King George's Street and the scenery was exceptional. The sky was so blue that it had to be fake. Fake because it was beautiful but not perfect. For how can it be perfect when you are not around to hold my hand and see this? Not perfect for nothing is, without you. Even the greatest memories fade and the tastiest food does not linger long. The majestic scenery by the bay was irrelevant as each picture I took, I kept imagining us together in it. That would have been beautiful.

Been trying to enjoy myself in Perth and its been a challenge. Came back immediately after dinner to hear your voice and it has never been dissapointing. We're going to see koalas and kangaroos tomorrow and that will be uplifting. Think if i kidnap a baby koala you would bail me out? hahaha...Kinda sad to hear you have to sneak out to get your preferred food. Typing this just after talking to you and wondering if you'll smile when you read this because I think your simpy too cute baby.

Missing someone does not change because of the distance nor does it change because the surroundings have changed. It only intensifies with time. The only time my eyes glimmer is when I get your sms, hear your voice or see your picture. Everytime you appear in my mind which is basically every second is so painful when I can not hold your hand.

Today is the fifth day and nothing has changed. Thankfully Bo is with her to take care and make sure she eats. Nothing ever changes. In fact, I have continued to miss you more than ever. The only thing that has changed in Perth is that the zombie still exists...luv u baby...